[You're a burden. He huffs out a tired, mirthless laugh--she isn't the only one to have thought that. Sometimes, in the darkest parts of the night when he can't sleep, he wonders if he doesn't just fuck up everything he touches, everything he does.]

Sometimes I don't understand why she helps, either. She was well within her rights to refuse to help me when I asked her to. [There's still so much he can't understand about her, honestly.] She still is.